Tuesday, February 7, 2017

Matters Of The Heart: He Proposed Five Years Ago And We Are Still Unmarried, Am I Still Engaged?

I don't know what will become of me if my worst fears happen to me. How on earth can I wear a ring for five years and still bear my father's name? My fiance doesn't even care, to him, the right time has to come.

My name is Ebere, I am 31 years old, I met IK 10 years ago during my final year at Nsukka. We have been dating for four years before he proposed to me with a very cute ring.

Altogether, we have been dating seriously for nine good years.
IK is 36 and fully established in all areas. He has a good business, a good apartment and two cars.

I also have a good job and we both love each other. Still, he thinks we should wait. Every time I ask him what exactly we are waiting for,  he gets angry and upset.

My friends think I'm crazy for still wearing the ring. They believe he doesn't want to marry me. I'm so confused. Why would a guy propose to a lady and keep her waiting for five years not counting the years before the ring?

I don't know what to do. The last time I talked about it, his response scared me. He told me to remove the ring if it made me uncomfortable.

That response keeps ringing in my head. Does it mean he wants to 'unengage' me (if there is a word like that)
No word in the dictionary can aptly describe my fear. If he leaves me, I might die.

I am tired of waiting.
What should I do?  I have met his parents,  he also met mine, but our parents have not been introduced.

Please help me.
Should I remove the ring and consider myself single or wait for him even though he hasn't told me how long more I have to wait?

Am I just being paranoid? But five years! Remember I'm 31... I love IK, but I'm not sure what's going on with him.

When I don't mention marriage, he is good, loving,  doting and all,  but once I mention marriage or stare at my ring finger for too long he gets angry.

I even attempted to get pregnant, but he warned me that would be the end of our relationship as no one would tie him down because of a baby.

I don't know, I don't know...

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